So today at work, my coworker walks into the break room and tells me that her two-year-old son went “poo poo” on the potty for the first time this morning. She followed up this announcement with a “Yay!” and clapped her hands several times. And I was like, big deal! I crap on the toilet every day. If that’s the most impressive thing your kid can do, you might want to get him checked out by a specialist. He might be a little slow. I mean, it took him two years to figure out how to crap in a toilet? I had my dog completely potty trained by the time he was three months old. Plus, the fact that I don’t have any kids should clue her in that I really don’t care, and that I’m not interested in her son’s bowel movements. She made the statement like it was a pivotal moment in her life. If this is what happens to people who have kids, count me out! In fact, I’m going to start taking two birth control pills every night just to be on the safe side.
Stephanie Walters 